an essay written by Johnny

Looking outside the window - describe the sight, sounds and activities.

looking outside the window got bird, got boy. boy eat bird- bird die. i see a rainbow outside. it is colourful. i am happy because it is beautiful. i see children playing balls outside. all kinds of balls. football, basketball, netball, baseball, ballball and more balls.

my mom and dad come into my room and sit beside me on my bed. my mom is sitting on my right and my dad is sitting on my left. they are happy and i am happy. suddenly, some sparrows flew past. our family dog then jumped out of window to catch some birds.

our dog is a very active dog. he eats a lot. he is a dog who eats a lot. this is why he is active. however, he is not a clever dog because he is mad. when he jumped out of the window, he forgot that our family lives on the twenty fifth floor. dog die. me sad.

this is a bad day for me looking outside the window because i am sad. i am sad because my parents jus bought the dog yesterday. we are sad. suddenly an aeroplane flies past the window. we forget aboud our dog and are very suprised because we never seen an aeroplane before. as a result, we are happy because the aeroplane is exiting.

my mom is talking to me but i keep looking out of the window. she screams but i still look outside the window. i am deaf because of the large sound from the aeroplane. we are sad again, but happy because the rainbow is still in the sky.

this is an exiting day outside my window.





teacher's comment: C+